I went through a major transition in my 30’s that was a life changing experience. It was a time in my life when I was at my lowest. I had no idea of who I was or what I wanted out of life, and just existed through a mad cycle of secrets, alcohol and shame. I had not “hit bottom” yet as I had a good job, great friends, and a loving family, but I had hit an emotional bottom.
What pushed me to make a change? The overwhelming feeling of emptiness, no feelings, no desires, no nothing.
Through hard work with a fierce counselor, sobriety, inner exploration, curiosity, and courage, I started to feel again. With feelings I could start to rebuild.
Everything felt new to me in this new state. Simple things like dancing, going out, and being with friends. I started to determine what I wanted in my life and what I didn’t need anymore. Gone was the club and party scene and what opened up was the outdoors.
I found peace in the mountains, a closeness to myself and to my higher power. I went as often as I could, but after awhile I wanted more than to just sit in a cabin or a car and look, I wanted to experience the mountains.
My exploration started with simple hikes and moved to scaling some of the tallest peaks in Washington. I took climbing courses in mountaineering, learned wilderness first aid, tried skiing, kayaking, trail running, rock climbing, anything as long as it was outdoors.
I was coaxed, pushed and stretched by my friends to drive myself further. With each outing I got stronger, braver and more competent. So, I climbed higher, went further, took more risks, and with each event came great successes and failures. I experienced joy on the summit of Mt Rainer, self-reliance as I canoed the wild Hurricana River in Quebec, and realized just how strong I was as I survived being lost and almost freezing to death in the Canadian Rockies.
With each outing I started to see who Mary really was: I was strong, brave, curious, persistent, self-sufficient, skilled in the outdoors and a leader. Through my journey I found me and with my learnings I had empowered myself.
These skills moved from the outdoors to all areas of my life and I took on more risk. I built a successful career, became a partner in my relationships, stood up for my needs and used my voice.
Today I live in Wyoming with my husband of 15 years on a small ranch surrounded by mountains with 7 horses and 1 dog, enjoying the joys and hard work of this lifestyle. When not at home we are in the mountains.
My life is blessed in so many ways, and because of this I want to help other women find their way and show them just how amazing they are and how fulfilling their lives can be. This is what I want to give you.